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Getting Off the Hamster Wheel: 3 Steps toward Lasting Change

2/21/2015

Every day we have a new opportunity to reinvent ourselves, become even better, and try something new. Why is it then that we allow ourselves to get stuck in routine, running around the same hamster wheel, day after day, believing it will take us somewhere new? Evangelist, Joyce Meyer says, “Good intentions never change anything. They only become a deeper and deeper rut.” Ruth Gordon, says, “So easy to fall into a rut isn’t it? Why then is it so comfortable, yet so unpopular?” It’s so easy to become complacent in the routine of life. Get up, get ready, go to work or school, go home, take care of a few essentials, go to bed, repeat again and again. Our life is not a bottle of shampoo, lather, rinse, repeat. Even my hair gets used to the same shampoo and I have to change up my shampoo from time to time. So why don’t we change things up?- Especially if we want to change our direction.

Behavioral change experts say that lasting change happens with repetitive actions over a 21-30 day period. So congratulations! By doing the same thing over and over you have mastered this step and you are poised to make a positive and lasting change in your life! Yeah! You didn’t even know you were on Step 1-Be Repetitive, and now you’ve completed it! So now what? The following are the next steps in your change action plan that will help you get off the hamster wheel and head toward the wide open world of possibilities and the new you that you desire.

Step 2-Envision- The first step toward the new you is to envision what it is you want. Do you want to have more time in the day? Do you want to eat healthier? Do you want to be more organized? I don’t typically recommend focusing on what you lack, but it is a good way to determine what it is that you do want based on what you do not want. Once you determine what it is you want to do different you are ready to move on to Step 3.

Step 3-Actionable Items- Each day you need to consciously develop a list of 3 things that will move you closer to the new you. I suggest you actually write it down, to serve as a visual reminder throughout the day. For example, if I desire to become more organized, my list may look something like this: 1) identify things that are unorganized (yep, I just directed myself to make a list from my list), 2) prioritize my list starting with the easiest to accomplish (this gives momentum as I accomplish), 3) determine an action plan of attack. Wow! Day 1 seemed pretty easy! But now for Day 2, it seems like I may be in trouble because I actually need to do something. Don’t fret, I’m giving you these examples so that you can see just how simple actionable items can bring forth big results. The Day 2 list may look something like this: 1) take 5 minutes to look up expert organizational tips 2) apply one of the tips learned today 3) attack one item from my Day 1 action list. Holy cow! Day 2 and I’ve already implemented way more than just the two improvements. How so? For one, I did something different in the first place. And then, before I started, I had already made a choice to head down and new path and started heading down a new path! And on top of that I implemented 2 new organizational improvements. The way I woke up, is completely different than the day before.

Pretty simple right? Keep going. Your original 21-30 days will lead to another change and you will look forward to the new road you have yourself on. Warning! Self-improvement is highly addictive and I can guarantee if you take these steps you will not be the same as when you started.

For more inspiration, read: It! Happens: A Practical Guide to Finding Your It by Jolene Church

available on Amazon.com, Barnes&Noble.com, and other fine book retailers.

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Unleash Your Potential With These Easy Steps

2/15/2015

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Realizing potential within ourselves, seeing the potential in others. What exactly is potential? Look up the word potential and you get- “having or showing the capacity to become or develop into something in the future; latent qualities or abilities that may be developed and lead to future success or usefulness; (and my favorite when associated with physics) the quantity determining the energy of mass in a gravitational field or of charge in an electric field.” Potential is many things and one of the same. Potential is simply greatness within each and every one of us that is unbirthed. So what are some ways for you to tap into your potential so that others will see your greatness manifested?

Ask yourself, “What do I want?” This question may be multifaceted but until you realize what it is that you want out of any situation, whether it is a relationship, career, school, or life in general, you really cannot tap into your true potential. Clarity on what it is that you want and the level of your desire, resolution toward, or opinions about will help you uncover your unbirthed greatness.

Do you have aspirations to be a manager or leader in your company? On the school newspaper? PTA President? A greater contributor to your community? Until you know what it is that you want, you cannot takes steps to get there. Think about it this way. In a job interview, others are looking at your potential to be able to perform the job that the company seeks to fill. They are also looking at the potential for you to fit in or to add value to the organization. The interviewers have defined what they want and are looking to see if they can identify through what you say and your experience that you have potential to fit the bill.

When you define what it is you want, you can tap into action.

Take meaningful action. Once you define what it is you want, you have a directional path. This is not a pre-defined path, your greatness defines the path, custom to you. Your potential is unlike that of anyone else. Your potential is unique to the design you give to it. You are the architect of your greatness. Take steps to be a better father, more attentive spouse, energetic learner, or valuable employee. Your actions design your greatness. Your potential is infinite and will shape-shift, defying all rules of physics. That is why I appreciate the definition of potential as associated with the laws of physics, “the quantity determining the energy of mass in a gravitational field or of charge in an electric field.” If you envision your potential as a mass of energy within you that has no end, you can create a picture in your mind of your potential as you take action.

As you take steps to be a better, more productive, attentive… person, spouse, employee…imagine this wild ball of swirling energy that has no beginning or end, coming out of you- while still in you. No matter how many actions you take and how much energy comes out, it is always connected to the mass within you. As you bring forth greatness from the potential within, the infinite supply of potential still exists.

Design greatness through your desires to expose your potential.

Be proud. Pride does not have to be thought of as boastful or negative. When we exude greatness, when we release our potential, we should be proud! The feeling from a job done exceptionally well is an awesome one. Be proud of your design and what you have given birth to! Just like any proud parent, when you have delivered greatness, it is hard to contain how you feel; so be proud!

I believe we get hung up on how people might perceive us. Don’t worry about that. Just focus on what you want and then dig deep to determine some meaningful action to achieve what you want. When people notice, be proud- you are on the right track!

Realize that nobody else is your business. You are the architect of your greatness. Don’t compare yourself to others. They have their own potential. They have potential unique to them. Never look at what others have and you do not. The focus on lack will inhibit the realization of your potential. It’s in you…… you just need to take some steps to bring it forth!

When you focus on just you, regardless of anyone else, it is not anymore selfish than brushing your own teeth. Do you brush your co-worker’s teeth? No, so why would you care about what they have or do not have? Focus on what you want that will bring forth greatness and build a better world for yourself and others.

So, great architect….. What are you going to design today?!

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I AM....

2/7/2015

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I AM! Such powerful words that can evoke such potential. When we declare it, we become it. What is your I AM? Let's hear what you proclaim to be... Start here with, I am....

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Feeling Stuck? Follow the Bouncing Ball to Help You Get Un-Stuck

2/7/2015

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As people go through life, seeking to find where to fit in, gaining experience and insight, often they end up in a place they didn’t necessarily intend to be. Some people lead highly structured and regimented lives and everything they do is part of their overall plan. Others, don’t fall into this category, they go with the flow. Most are somewhat of a hybrid between the two. There are always extremes to any spectrum and the norm is somewhere in the middle. For some reason, the extremes seem to be the basis for measure. Do I know what I want but am willing to move forward without structure? Then I am at the bottom of the spectrum. Do I have a plan for a plan? Then I am at the high end. What happens when you have a plan and the plan falls apart? What happens when you’d like to have a plan, but don’t even know where to begin?

Whether circumstances in your life inhibit your ability to develop a plan or something that you would have never imagined emerge derails your plan, how do you get to a place of contentment? A common problem faced by many is getting stuck, either before the start, or somewhere in the middle. There is quite a bit to learn from the two extremes.

The planners have a plan for a plan. They set their mark and aim for it. Nothing will detract from the mark. You may call them overachievers or go-getters, but what they are is focused. These people do not take their eye off the ball. If the ball moves, they shift to stay focused on the ball. The ball can go completely out of bounds, out of the court, down the block and roll into unimagined territory and their eye does not lose sight of the ball. The planners run after the ball, seize it, and keep it within their line of sight at all times. Why is this important? We are what we continually think about.

If you continually look to where you want to be and see every experience as a means to achieve your goals, your goals are always within line of sight. Planners seem to have this skill down. A junior high school student with aspirations to be an astronaut may seek knowledge about becoming an astronaut, attend space camp, and join networks to connect with other likeminded individuals. As the student enters high school, GPA and extra-curricular activities become predominant thoughts as these will enable the student to move closer to the ball. If a setback occurs along the way, the planner will come up with another plan to course correct. Let’s say the student didn’t get into a specific program in college or after college. Planners, continue pushing forward until the goal is realized, no matter how many set-backs along the way.

The other extreme of the spectrum, those that go with the flow, have equally admirable qualities. This group can be unstoppable because they have no preconceived thoughts that they cannot. They decide to do something and they let the world show them the way, one unfolding event after another. What is great is that when something happens to derail this group, they don’t even recognize it as a derailment, they simply steer around, over, through, or whatever to continue where they were heading. What’s even better is sometimes instead of pushing past this potential derail, they see a new opportunity they had never considered.

When you think of people who go with the flow, you may conjure up an image of a hippy, hanging out, going with the flow of life. This is not what this group is all about. This group is not lazy, lacking discipline, or could be considered slackers, by any means. This group simply takes a more open-minded approach to accomplishing what they would like. They know that to get to point B from point A there may be certain requirements, but they allow their ball to adapt to the circumstances and shift to fit. They also recognize that new opportunities, previously not considered could arise. This is an important element to consider for those who get stuck as adaptability is the key to avoiding derailment and initiating the development of any plan.

When you allow circumstances to dictate where you are and who you are, you have lost all freedom of choice. You have jumped right into a neat little categorized, homogenous box. When you look past the point that someone seems smarter than you (they could well be- so what?!) or that your current financial position is dire (that can change), then you can move past stuck. So what do both the planners and the free-flowers have in common? They know what they want. If you look at it this way, there is nothing really in between unless you are clueless to what you want; and that is why people get tripped up.

When a plan is derailed, if you know what you want, you figure a new path to get there, regardless of whether you are a planner or a free-flower. What you want as a planner is definitive, whereas what you want as a free-flower, could be limitless. Think of it this way, how many inventions resulted from an accident or something not going quite as planned? Other inventions were a result of careful actionable steps and planning. Both achieved the desired result. I believe people often get stuck when they look at the unexpected as negative. You learn from everything you do. If you eat a brussel sprout and think it is the nastiest thing on the planet, you have learned. If you eat a brussel sprout and think, “Wow! That’s great!,” you have learned.

The lesson to take away from this is that you can be diligent and never take your eye off the ball and adapt as the ball moves or you can let the ball change shape to adapt. Whichever way you go, by shifting perspective and adapting, you will allow your creativity and ingenuity to help you find a new path. You don’t need to “chalk this one up” as a failure, rather, as a lesson learned on a path that didn’t take you to your desired location. What you do need to do is reflect on what didn’t work and how you can get to where you wanted to go. This is also the time to reflect and ask yourself, “Did I lose sight of the ball all together?” If you are truthful, you may have found that instead of keeping your eye on the ball or allowing it to take another shape, you went down a rabbit trail all together without your ball. The great thing is, you can pivot your thinking and focus, find the ball, all, while going with the flow. Just follow the bouncing ball to get unstuck and achieve what you desire.

For more inspiration, read: It! Happens: A Practical Guide to Finding Your It by Jolene Church

available on Amazon.com, Barnes&Noble.com, and other fine book retailers.

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Successful Thinking Mindset

Getting Off the Hamster Wheel: 3 Steps toward Lasting Change

Unleash Your Potential With These Easy Steps

I AM....

Feeling Stuck? Follow the Bouncing Ball to Help You Get Un-Stuck

Monthly Coaching Give-Away Entry

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